A Little Slow, a Little Late

Apr 28

Stolen The Wire Epigraph

For those of you who haven’t seen The Wire, it is about a dollhouse furniture hobbyist’s dark journey into spying on illicit phone conversations between young men.

This is how underperforming teams turn wins into draws and draws into losses. Both sides ended up unhappy with the officials. I don’t think the officials made any egregious errors, but in a game that set the NWSL record for fouls, you could definitely argue that the management of the game could have gone better from an officiating perspective.

The performance by Racing was better but in the times that ultimately mattered they ended up being a little slow and a little late. Both penalties might have been on the soft side, but by the letter of the law, the officials were fully within their rights to call them. Personally, I think they got them both right. They also got the call right on the build-up to the Sears goal by letting the contact by Fischer go. Some might see the contract made by Fischer and the contact made by Sears as an apples-to-apples comparison, but I don’t. Fischer’s contact was more natural and a coming together of feet. Sears was more direct and making no attempt on the ball. In short, Fischer’s contract was natural in the flow of play and Sears was deemed to be unnatural enough as to impede her opponent. Both penalties demonstrate the fine margins between winning and losing in this league. Even on Turner’s goal you could argue that Wright and Petersen were a little slow and late in closing her down.

When the margin of error is so thin you just cannot afford to be slow or late. If you are, it ends up costing you dearly.

Post Match Moment of the Match

Both teams (and specifically coaches) lost their composure as the match neared its end. Sergio Gonzalez actually got sent off when the match was still in progress, but Ary Borges was so upset that she got a post-match red card for getting in the official’s face. Stoppage time did seem to drag on, but it is hard to know exactly when the official is going to decide that the match is over, especially when there are multiple stoppages in stoppage time. Borges now finds herself suspended for the next match and really can have no complaints about it. Multiple players complained on various platforms after the match. I am sure fans did the same. In a month or so, I am sure everyone will be completely over it.

Were the Announcers Good?

JP Dellacamera and Jill Loyden were on the call. I thought Jill was good. JP Dellacamera was disappointing.

Subsection: How was their “Louisville”?

Louisvillians are persnickety on the pronunciation of their beloved hometown. I will be monitoring the broadcaster’s commitment to getting it right.

Jill: Solid. Two syllables. Sounded like a native.

JP: Alway three syllables but sometimes French and sometimes not. JP struggled with player names too. I don’t think he did his homework.

JP put in one of the laziest play-by-play efforts I have heard in some time. He struggled to say “Milliet” smoothly a few times and completely butchered Sonis pronouncing it “So-niece”. The club makes it easy to get pronunciations right because they put out a guide. He seemed bizarrely fascinated by the amount of stoppage time in the first half. He also seemed to disagree with the decision to let Sears’ goal stand (Jill did too) but I thought the official got that one right. He did do a good job at pointing out the number of fouls but did get a little fixated on it to the point of distraction. To me, he seems like a guy who has lost his fastball and maybe it's time to step aside.

TV Kit Rating

The fine details on the kit don't read in the wide shots on broadcasts. Here is an explanation of the kit from their team shop:

“Our new kit is a celebration of the heart and soul of Portland—the community that drives the Thorns. The dark shades of black symbolize the strength and unity within our city, while the glowing reds represent the embers burning at the heart of our team and supporters. Just like a small spark can grow into an unstoppable fire, the Thorns are powered by the passion of our players and fans alike.”

Puke! What a bunch of group think nonsense.

On the positive side it does look like a Portland Thorns kit and isn't confusingly green for no reason. 6/10

Making Your Youth Soccer Coach Weep

Mallie McKenzie had a foul throw in the 2nd minute. In the olden days this would result in a payment into the fine jar and endless ridicule from teammates. Today, that is probably seen a barbaric and “bullying”. Therefore, it is up to me to shame players when they can't do things that a 5-year-old gets right. Do better! (Also 5-year-olds don't get post-match red cards for dissent). By the way one of my friend's 5-year-old daughter scored 18 goals in a match this weekend, so there's that. What a ballhog!

…out of Nowhere

In honor of Kayla Fischer’s goal out of nowhere (really a bone-headed mistake by Portland) here are a bunch of RKOs out of nowhere.

“‘Please be careful’ is never careful ‘til it hears the gun”

“Appetite”/Steve McQueen/1985

For all of Racing’s faults so far this season, they usually have kept their composure pretty well. They might have been a little too measured and composed in the second half against San Diego, but the wheels came off of the composure bus late in the second half in Portland. It takes a good deal of composure to see out a match, especially when you don’t do it often enough to make it habit forming. For all of her good traits, Emma Sears didn't help Racing out much in the final minutes. She attempted to take the ball to the corner late in the match and then immediately kicked it over the line to concede a goal kick, essentially nullifying the whole point of taking a ball to the corner. The penalty she conceded was the result of an unnecessary stamp on the foot. I struggle with Borges’ performances sometimes. She is definitely “Brazilian” in her theatrics, of which I am not a fan. Her rolling around on the floor on very light contact resulted in a pretty big chunk of the stoppage time allotment at the end of the match. One might say that is was poetic justice that she received a red card because I personally thought her theatrics both in and after the match were borderline shameful.

Conceding multiple penalties seems like something that should be avoidable, if you are locked in and focused. The penalty that Flint conceded, while soft, was completely unnecessary as Moultrie was going nowhere with the ball in that spot.

I don't know what Sergio Gonzalez said to get a red card, but I bet you that it wasn't thoughtful and measured.

Racing is not ever in a position to lose its collective head, but this one especially hurts because it feels like they threw away 2 points. That is something they simply cannot do.

Elizabeth’s Thoughts

“Why couldn’t the match have ended at halftime? Racing sort of acted like it did.”

Michael Shaw