I thought the story of the match would be Aiden McFadden’s new haircut, or maybe Jansen Wilson’s two goals in twelve minutes, but it was evidently Damian Las’s double save that won him Man of the Match and gave him talking points for the media and the Post-Match Celebration in the Fifth Third* Premium Club as well as every party he’ll ever go to until he’s 30.

*Please send me some money, Fifth Third, for this otherwise free promotion of the greatest banking services in the world (wink). You can make the check out to “Cash.”

But before I get to the four goals, or the crowd at Lynn Family doing the wave, let’s look at the pre-match fun that was had by all. Fans were lined up deep outside both main gates to get inside early for a free Lou City shirt and so many other goodies! Fossi Lou balloons offered free balloon creations (in mostly purple, of course!), there were inflatables, and there was face painting!

(True story: I tried doing face painting once, for a free community event, around the time that the Avengers Endgame was raking in gazillions at the Box office, and this sweet little boy asked me to paint his face as “Thanos.” (Pro tip for anyone offering a free service at a large event, give people a MENU so they don’t ask for crazy things like painting their face as Thanos.) So, any way I used all my purple paint to cover this kid’s face like one of those charcoal masks that ladies think makes their skin glow and this kid was beyond excited. I now include this skill on my resume.

Goodrum’s Celebration Gallery

Jansen Wilson Celebration Gallery

Jansen Wilson Goal Two Celebration Gallery

Back to the warm-ups from the bench. This is how talent gets ready. Everyone take notes. Gallery.

Before we break for half, we need to repeat a throw-in seven times. We need Aiden and 7 to have an inside joke that they will never share with the rest of the class, and we need the ref to yell at players for not getting out of the way of a free kick. We need a Gallery.